Jay Speyerer
Writer _Speaker _Untrainer*

412.999.4697

 

 

Try the treadmill! No sweat!
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Ride the treadmill! Click to order

Read some excerpts:

From “Iphone, You Phone, We All Phone”
For those of you whose birthdays fall after that of Texas Instruments, a slide rule is a calculating device that looks like a thick ruler. A narrow strip covered with numbers slides in a precisely fitted groove within a larger strip, also festooned with digits. It’s one evolutionary step above an abacus, but with a lot of training and practice, it can be used for such tasks as propping up the short leg of your kitchen table.

From “Curmudgeon’s Resolution: Lighten Up”
There are oddities in local TV news that one simply can not ignore, such as the story about broken sewer lines that affected renters in a particular building. The news reader told us about the repair crews fixing "the ruptured tenants’ lines." Apparently the tenants were trying to remove their belongings, which, apparently, were very heavy.

From “I’m Just Sayin’: Don’t overtax your expressions”
Catchphrases float around like dandelion seeds on the wind, and every once in a while one gets lodged in your brain where it takes root and spreads until you can’t ignore it any more and you finally surrender and say, "Okay, but what do you mean?" Such is the case with our seedling of the moment, "I’m just sayin’."

From “Shug, Dub, and Dabs. What’s in a company name?”
The Internet is rife with ill-named entities... An online search will turn up such improbable names as the Amigone Funeral Home, Bearable Dentistry, Bender Chiropractic, the May Pop Tire Shop, and the Fractured Prune Donut Shoppe. (Their web site is a lovely shade of purple.

From “Sounds of the Season”
Animals: I’m not referring to lowing cattle. This could be your standard dog, cat, parakeet, gerbil, or even a horse, should you have one. The sound of a current pet could lead you to stories of its latest antics (Kitty Kat’s encounter with the Roomba) or to memories of pets no longer with us (Tweety-Bird’s encounter with the Roomba).

From “Speakers and the Mother Tongue”
Here’s the problem with a laissez faire attitude toward the mother tongue: Any error that people recognize, whether written or spoken, makes them stop. We don’t want that. I once saw someone’s status on LinkedIn that said I should use his services so I could insight my clients’ needs. You can’t "insight" anything because it’s not a verb. And he should have known that. Did that gaffe make me stop? You bet. Did it make me question everything else he said? Double you bet.

From “Brain Rot – It’s Back”
The Greek philosopher Socrates is actually on record as coming out against the idea of the written word, saying that it would cause a lapse in critical thinking because a student would not have to exercise his memory, thus causing it to atrophy. Another reason he had for disliking books — scrolls, actually — was because you couldn’t have a dialogue with one. No matter how many times you read it, the damn thing just kept saying the same things over and over. Said "record" comes from later philosophers, such as Plato, because no writings by Socrates exist for the simple fact that he didn’t like to— well, you know.

From “Phoenix: It was a trip”
Over the years, I’ve noticed that speakers from cities like Pittsburgh, New York, Philadelphia, and Boston often make an effort to tone down their accents. But our Southern friends, knowing a good thing when they hear it, crank theirs up to 11. At the end of one brief presentation by a lady who lives so far south of the Mason-Dixon Line that she can see the Equator from her house, we were all figuratively ankle-deep in corn pone and sour mash. Note: If a Southerner takes an accent reduction class, do they go through with-drawl?

Order your copy here

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Look who's jumped on the Treadmill!

 

I read Treadmill -- twice! It’s that good. You’ll chuckle in some places and say, “That’s a great idea. Why didn’t I think of that?”
~Terry Brock, speaker, marketing coach, journalist

Cat Got Your Treadmill? is fun-with-words meets advanced-business-communications. It's a light read with serious implications, so put down your textbook and pick up a copy of Treadmill.
~Michel Neray, speaker and Chief Differentiation Officer, The Essential Message
Canadian Association of Professional Speakers, Toronto


Can this be right? A book that actually makes you think? Jay's essays are insightful, clever, funny, and...yep...they surely make you think. I kept saying to myself, "I wish I'd said that."
~Lou Heckler, Motivational Humorist and Speaker Coach

Treadmill is playful, rigorous, and thought provoking. If you already love words, you’ll enjoy the way Jay makes them dance on the page. And if you haven’t really fallen for words yet, you’ll find yourself gazing at them with a new-found affection. (You’ll also learn a thing or thirty about how to use them.)
~Nancy Van Iderstine, author, Twentieth Century Fox: The First 75 Years

It's rare enough to find an excellent thinker and writer. Jay Speyerer is more than that because in this book, his sharp thinking and zesty writing will help YOU do better at both!
~David Newman,
Founder of Do It! Marketing and
past president, National Speakers Association Philadelphia


Turning the pages is nearly impossible when you're laughing hysterically. Refreshing and witty, Cat Got Your Treadmill? is the cure for what ails you. Who else but Jay would dare to compare Gene Autry with Frasier Crane?
~Pat Richley-Erickson/ Dear Myrtle's Family History Hour

Sometimes I think Jay must be the love child of Dave Barry and Deborah Tannen. The math doesn’t work, but the communication insights and irreverent wit sure do.
~Ann Metzger, Henry J. Buhl Co-chair, Carnegie Science Center

Jay Speyerer in book form is a comfortably seated friend or favorite uncle who shares your bemusement, tweaks your lazy habits, and gives you good advice that never sounds like a lecture. You will learn much more in these pages than how Dub Taylor got his nickname.
~Samantha Bennett, writer and past president, National Society of Newspaper Columnists
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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* All of my training seminars are PowerPoint-free zones. It's just the audience, the content, and me.

Copyright © 2014 by Jay Speyerer